Sadly this is NOT the beginning of a dance number.

It is a quiet morning on the ice flow. Tiny baby seals scurry about chasing each other and splashing playfully in the water as their fat, bloated mothers lay motionless on the ice. Suddenly there comes a rumbling from beneath. Out of a glowing portal spring dozens of stout club-wielding minions and their master–a hulking, armored, blue-skinned abomination who raises one glowing fist towards the crowd of seal pups. The stout brown minions squeal with delight, anxious to harvest the life force of these creatures for their master, and use their skins to make hats. The creatures stream out from their master and then, they were upon them.

The first five minutes of Overlord II is the greatest intro I have ever played in a game. After a short tutorial they set you and your small army against a crowd of fuzzy, friendly animals which you in turn use to generate screaming bloodthirsty minions. Then you must turn your attention to the Elf hippies who are protecting them. It is wonderful. Since the first Overlord, Codemasters have really upped the evil factor. In the original it was possible to be a beneficent Overlord who helped villages and assisted the weak (if only to double cross them later) but in Overlord II you are undeniably evil.

This time the choice is between domination and destruction. Do you turn the towns you conquer into productive villages full of mentally dominated slaves that will throw themselves in front of any danger you encounter? Or do you turn the towns into a burning hellscape where all of the inhabitants have been harvested for life force and liquidated for gold? It is refreshing after being forced to choose between good and evil to be asked what style of evil you wish to practice. There is no option to save the puppy from the inferno, but there are several choices for the side dish to be served with it.

Overlord II is a beautifully indulgent little game, but when I say little, I mean it. While your dark tower is big and impressive everything else seems smaller. The selection of armor and weapons is smaller, and the number of side quests, general length and the spell selection all leave something to be desired. Perhaps this is why Overlord II did not warrant the ticket price of a full game.

There are some added features that make it feel like an actual sequel and not an expansion pack. Mounts for minions give them special abilities and double their effectiveness, a new spell system, minion possession quests where you take a seat and allow the little guys to go it solo, and sailable ships make their first appearance to the franchise.

Wonder Twin powers ACTIVATE!

What Overlord II delivers is shined, polished and terribly addictive. The environments are wonderfully rendered, fun to explore and pimping out your dark fortress is just as fun as ever. The game does not overstay its welcome and combat has gone though some changes to make it more pleasing. Clashes with Imperial Legions are much more satisfying than the bloated enemies of the first game. Instead of the crazy area damage and cheap one-shot-kill attacks, legionnaires allow for a wide slurry of tactical choices. There is much less minion meat grinding, and mindlessly sending your troops to certain deaths over and over. Assassinating centurion officers, flanking maneuvers, and bursting through the center with wolf mounted minions are all viable options.

The combat in Overlord II feels much more like a major military engagement with one evil army to having to fight against another equally evil army. There are still a number of fights against giant trolls, and hulking creatures to be subdued, but the legion combat keeps the game from being a samey hack-and-slash button masher. Overlord has identified its niche and does a great job at delivering what is expected of it.

That being said, I did miss the satire that was inherent in the first game. The idea of playing as a pseudo-Sauron and hunting down each member of the stereotype magic band of adventurers is what pushed me to finish the first game. Plus, there were several moments which the title of hero and overlord switched. It was a joy to follow up on the heroes and seeing their righteous band degrade into gluttonous partying, wealth obsession, freaky cult worship, or just blind barbarian rage. The story allowed us to step into the shoes of our favorite evil wizard-generals and worked great for the game.

Tuft helmets really should have a comeback.

This time around you battle the Empire, which seems to be doing every thing you would be doing if you were in charge of this fantasy world, i.e. rounding up all the magical creatures to sap their energies, building lavish mansions, and throwing dissidents into the arena to fight for the amusement of their Emperor. While the Empire is a fun enemy to fight, the conflict appears to be an evil pissing contest, trading mindless minions for mindless legionnaires. There is no satire to be had about the Roman Empire that does not already feel trite. We get it; pan to fat greasy man in a toga being fed grapes, click to continue.

Despite all of these complaints, I cannot give it a stronger endorsement. Overlord II may stumble at times but it never completely collapses. There are great little moments like disguising minions as Empire soldiers–while they march they whistle the theme to Bridge Over the River Kwai. It’s just good fun and that is rare in an age of gaming where good and evil and moral ambiguity are everywhere. It is nice to have one game in which the choice is much easier. That feeling of your mother standing over you pointing her finger saying “Shame on you!” when you decide to steal, murder, or break a multitude of laws is completely gone. Well, not gone… She’s actually the first boss, and my minions pulled out her false teeth and have started wearing her sweaters.